The brahmin Māgandiya once asked the Buddha about how to detach:
Question: How does one quench all this urge of craving and clinging?
One should stop all mental diversification and proliferation by giving up the
conception "I am"! This internal craving for existence should be dispelled...
Whatever theory one understands should neither induce pride, nor thereby
regarding of 'Me' as better, worse or equal to anyone. When contacted by
various forms, one should not form a mental image or concept about a self!
Such friend is at peace within himself & need not seek peace from another!
He neither takes up, nor lays down anything. Therefore he cannot be moved!
He does not desire any sights, sounds, flavours, amusements or common talk.
He would not cherish or delight in any phenomena at all, in the entire world...
When affected by pain, he does not lament, nor does he long for survival or
tremble, when in great danger. He would not accumulate anything, whether
things, eatables or clothes. Nor is he afraid of not receiving or loosing all...
Such Bhikkhu is a meditator, not foot-loose, pure, not negligent, dwelling in
remote lodgings, where there is little noise & no disturbance from company...
Sutta-Nipāta 915-925 Edited excerpt.
On this Craving (Tanhā) and Clinging (Upādanā) that has to be quenched:The 3 kinds of Craving, Elemental Analysis, Craving_is_Pain, Cut_Craving,
Craving_is_Cause, Origin_of_Suffering, Ceasing_of_Suffering, Cool Calm
Craving_is_Catastrophic, Shaking_off_Evil, Clinging_to_the_notion_I_Am,
What are the 5 Clusters of Clinging, The_4_kinds_of_Clinging,
Comment:What is it, that is quenched? It is the fire of greed, hate and ignorance,
that is quenched. There is nothing else - here or there - to be quenched...